5. "But you never TAUGHT us THIS...!"
In some cases, this is OK. Just not when we're talking about nouns after I've spent a week and a half covering them. In detail. With all sorts of color-coded whiteboard games and Mad Libs. And Schoolhouse Rock videos. Did I mention that I'm teaching fourth grade? Yeah. You see how it is...
4. (Careful... this one is a two-parter)
Student: "I don't GET it..."
Me: "OK... what part don't you get?"
Student: "... AAAALLLLL of it!"
Me: Sigh. Consider banging head against wall. Decide against the wall plan and take a peek at Student's paper. Point. "First, put your name on the paper." Walk away and repeat with the student three desks over. If you make it through 5 students before your head explodes, you win. Go directly to the teacher's lounge and scarf down any form of unguarded chocolate you find.
3. "But this is HAAAAAAARRRRRD..."
My response to this varies with the student. Sometimes it's, "Well, let's take it one step at a time... First, put your name on the paper..." Sometimes it's "Yes... Welcome to fourth grade. Your point is?" And sometimes (if it happens to be Rennie or Jason saying it) it's "Noooo, this isn't hard, it's complex... Which are two related but linguistically separate things." Which means I now have to tell y'all about Rennie, but that's a whole other post entirely...
2. "But I don't WANT to..."
Of course you don't want to... If you DID, you would have already come up with this idea on your own and finished it. Probably while I was explaining something else, to which your response was...
1. "Do we HAAAAAAAVVVVVE to do this???"
No, no, of course not... I just spent the past 5 minutes explaining the directions for this art project/math game/vocabulary worksheet because I enjoy talking to myself in front of a room full of 10-year-olds, all of whom are now wondering if it would be better to notify their parents of their teacher's insanity or just sit back and enjoy the ride... ^_^
When I (someday) have my own classroom, one of the first things I'm going to do is create one of these bad boys... Many thanks to Ms. Teach for the idea :-D
As soon as any one of those phrases passes the lips of one of my students, they will earn a pick from the Fortune Teller of Doom... I swear on the soul of my father... Domingo Montoya...
Well, maybe not, but still... you see how utterly serious I am about this subject. ^_^
And now, for those of you who know exactly what Schoolhouse Rock song I was referring to (and who now have it running around in your head like a caffeinated hamster...)
